I don’t know about you but I am sick to the back teeth of the Conservative party leadership campaign – or ‘race’ as some sections of the media bizarrely call it – even those it’s only been dragging on for a few days. Some people are suggesting that the outgoing leader and still current PM Boris Johnson, the third PM in a row to be brought down by Boris Johnson, wants to throw his hat into the ring, like Tom Tugendhat who will in future be known as Tugend because he already has. But it looks like whoever wins we are going have another fruit loop as our next world king.
If I had a vote, I would certainly know what to do: I’d spoil my ballot paper. How on earth could anyone vote for an utter buffoon like Suella Braverman whose main policy ‘ideas’ are to keep banging on about Brexit forever and withdrawing the UK from the European Court of Human Rights (ECHR), which was drawn up after World War Two by British lawyers and fully supported by that well known left winger, Winston Churchill. And most of the other candidates want to continue what they call ‘THE WAR ON WOKE’ or, as it actually is, ‘THE WAR ON SOCIAL EQUALITY’. You know the type: women, ethnic minorities, the LGBT community and particularly those of us who basically support social equality.
To my utter astonishment, it is transport secretary Grant Shapps who declares himself to be the woke candidate: “If people want a PM who talks about woke (social equality) issues at all don’t vote for me,” he says, effectively torching his chances from the start. No traditional Tory, let alone the loons and fruit loops on the Tory benches will vote for Shapps if he is going to stand up for social equality. What was he thinking about?
At first, I felt that the candidate Labour would most fear was Jeremy Hunt but apart from having a name that describes how people felt about him when he was health secretary he has chosen right-wing crazy woman Esther McVey as his running mate. And like all candidates who want to be Tory PM, he wants to carry on with Johnson’s bonkers policies to trash the Good Friday agreement and send desperate refugees to East Africa. Meet the new boss, same as the old boss.
Speaking of migrants who are standing, Nadhim Zahawi, from Iraq, the man who famously claimed parliamentary expenses for keeping his horses warm, is right up there, as well as second generation Brits like Brand Rishi Sunak and, potentially, the appalling Priti Patel. Speaking of stupid, we’ve already got famously dim Liz Truss on the ballot paper and maybe soon Johnson fan girl, ‘Mad’ Nadine Dorries, who was so concerned about nepotism in politics she employed two of her own daughters to run her MP’s office. You couldn’t make this stuff up.
As befits the first MP to ever make the Sunday Times rich list, slick Rishi Sunak is running on a platform of austerity, which means pain mainly for those on low incomes. He doesn’t put it like that, instead using comfortable language like he won’t “sugar coat” the ugly truth and how future generations cannot be left to pick up the tab on what we spend today, but only a fool, say a Mail or Sun reader, would fall for that one. “Bloke worth three quarters of a billion quid to starve the poor” wouldn’t make for a good slogan, but Brand Sunak’s PR team will have thought that one through.
We’ve got bloody weeks of this so the the only thing to do is to switch of the talk radio stations and do something constructive, like sitting in the sun and getting pissed while you can still afford it.
Instead of all this electioneering bullshit, can’t we have some decency, honesty, compassion and competence? Judging from the Tory party leadership contest, we may have to wait a bit longer tor that.
