Born in Bristol, Rick Johansen worked for the DWP from 1974 to 2014. In addition to writing this blog since 2014, he has contributed to the award-winning Bristol Rovers programme, The Pirate and wrote the book Corfu Not A Scorcher. He is married with two sons and lives in South Gloucestershire.
When were you happiest?
In 2015, when I worked for the British Red Cross, visiting lonely and isolated people in rural areas.
What is your greatest fear?
Getting dementia.
What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?
My inability to take in simple instructions.
What is the trait you most deplore in others?
Lying.
What was your most embarrassing moment?
Catching a train from Bristol Temple Meads to Bristol Parkway to meet my partner who was going for a pregnancy scan. Unfortunately, the train was going directly to Birmingham and I had to beg the guard to let me use the phone to tell her the embarrassing news. I didn’t have a ticket either.
What is your most treasured possession?
My programme from Steely Dan’s gig at the Bristol Hippodrome in 1974, autographed by the entire original band, plus additional musicians Jeff Porcaro and Michael McDonald.
What would your superpower be?
When I was young, I was convinced that if I worked hard enough, I’d be able to fly. I still dream about it but I accept it’s unlikely to happen now.
What do you most dislike about your appearance?
Everything except my legs. You won’t see many photos of me on social media, or anywhere else for that matter.
What is your most unappealing habit?
Eating raw minced beef, preferably with salt, pepper and diced onions.
What did you want to be when you were growing up?
A writer.
What is the worst thing anyone’s said to you?
When I was referred to the British Red Cross’s occupational therapy officer, following a mental breakdown after being bullied and abused by various managers, she told me I was “emotionally weak”.
What is your guiltiest pleasure?
Buying new music pretty well all the time.
What do you owe your parents?
Nothing. It’s complicated.
To whom would you most like to say sorry, and why?
Every girl I treated badly. I’m very sorry for being a twat.
What does love feel like?
Going to bed with your best mate.
What’s the worst job you’ve ever done?
My last year at the British Red Cross when they forced me to work alone in a small stationary cupboard in their Easton office.
If you could edit your past, what would you change?
I’d have been brought up by two loving parents in same household and been encouraged and supported to make good choices, instead of having to make it all up as I went along.
How often do you have sex?
Every hour on the hour, if not more.
What single thing would improve the quality of your life?
Being paid to write. Failing that, a little part-time job helping people out.
What keeps you awake at night?
It used to be night terrors and panic attacks, but now mainly post nightmare anxiety and having this engine going in my head which won’t switch off.
How would you like to be remembered?
A decent dad and partner.
What is the most important lesson life has taught you?
It’s not what you know, it’s who you know.
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