Not just William

Ever watched a TV show that had you in bits from beginning to end? That’s what happened to me today when I watched the BBC documentary ‘A Royal Team Talk: Tackling Mental Health.’ Here was footballing royalty, including Thierry Henry and Gareth Southgate, meeting proper royalty in the form of Prince William, to discuss mental health.

Something resonates with you when you can relate to whatever it is you are watching or listening to. The stories of famous footballers, not to mention those of the future king of England no less, rang true. Their wealth and indeed privilege did nothing to shield them from the black dog.

The footballers and future king were joined by four men from the ‘normal’ world of work who had suffered from their own demons. Every story was different, the outcome much the same. Debilitating depression and anxiety.

Actually, all the stories had, if not happy endings, then a gateway to a brighter day. They all agreed that men needed to talk more about their issues and men were the last people who talked about their issues.

And many of the stories sounded like mine. Becoming isolated, wild fluctuations in mood, wild fluctuations in appetite, feeling hopeless, that life was pointless, negative body image. All these things and more. Every time I heard a story that sounded like mine, I broke down. Even during the uplifting parts, I still couldn’t stem the flood. In fact, the uplifting parts made me feel worse about my own issues.

Suddenly, I was very jealous as the men talked about their improvement to the extent that they were well into recovery. I’ve never felt like that and I have long understood that I never will. I didn’t wish ill on them, of course, but I did wish it was me, too.

Prince William talked of the trauma of losing his mother, of the things he saw as part of the air ambulance service. As ever, we were confronted with the astonishing sight of a member of the royal family, and a seriously high level one at that, cutting through to the core of the debate. In every way, just like his brother Harry, Prince William gets it.

I have no idea if William gets it because of his mother or from any other person or life experience. It could be all these things and more. Either way, his involvement was as moving as it was important. For people who have suffered silently for years, who had given up hope, who thought nothing would ever change, he talked the language of the sufferer.

It was easily the best TV show I have ever seen on mental health. Simple, to the point and painfully honest. These men, William included, were men of courage, talking about something many of us had been too embarrassed to talk about for years.

I don’t buy the commonly stated view that our country is now beginning to deal properly with mental ill health. I still hear far too many weasel words, like those from the prime minister who professes an understanding of the devastation caused by poor mental health and then, by words and deeds, actually making things worse. And a popular media that still looks upon mental health as something you can just deal with by pulling yourself together.

It will take more than the actions of our future king to finally give the victims of poor mental health the chance of a better life and a meaningful future. It’s a big step forward, though, and if we are going to have a royal family, I can think of worse people than Diana’s two sons to take us to those sunlit uplands.