Man Flu alert

As Frankie Valli might have put it, “Oh what a night, late December 2022, was not a very special night for me.” Mine was not special because overnight I man aged to develop what is currently a very minor cold, which meant I kept spluttering myself awake. After a long lie-in, I had concluded this must be Covid. Almost any symptoms can be attributed to that sodding virus and as I haven’t had it since early February last year, it must be back again. So, out came one of the few surviving test kits. The result, I knew, would be inevitable. Now how does the test kit work?

I had completely forgotten what to do, so my long-suffering partner had to explain it to me, as if I was an errant child who hadn’t been paying attention. “No, don’t put it up your nose first. You rub it against your tonsils, then your nose,” which turned out to be very helpful advice since the last thing I wanted for breakfast was a giant bogey. I gagged and retched my way through the test expecting, almost willing, a positive result but it soon became clear that not every single bug you catch these days is Covid. I have an early-stage cold. All I can do now is to hope it doesn’t turn into that most serious of diseases; man flu. Pray for me.