“Serves you right,” a small voice inside my head announced. “Whilst your dearly beloved eats a home made Tortilla, accompanied by a Frappe, from an authentic Spanish beachside eatery, you just couldn’t help yourself. You saw a Burger King – A BURGER KING!!! – and went there instead.” And so I did. And why did it serve me right? Because this was probably the only Burger King in the world that had run out of beef products.

It was a collapse of willpower, a weakening of the senses, a reaction to a minor stomach ailment following the excessive consumption of Chorizo and assorted sauces the night before. I needed some comfort food in the form of a hamburger and got a chicken burger drowning in mayonnaise instead. Serves me right, all right!

I’m afraid I have form in this department. McDonalds in Corfu on more than one occasion, Subway in Ottawa (“how could you?”) and now this. So, why?

Rather than opening my eyes to new foods as I get older, the reverse happens. I have found myself treating perfectly good meals as if they were unexploded bombs (UXBs). And this happens more than ever.

Part of it is down to some unfortunate incidents in Greece where I was, on two occasions, served chicken that wasn’t properly cooked (or in one instance not cooked at all) and on another a taverna where the chef prepared meals in full view of customers, happily tossing raw chicken on the same surface as he sliced (very stale) bread, as we later discovered. Now, I have got it in my head that everywhere is like this.

So today, I dealt with my irrationality by buying some high fat fast food crap and ending up with something I didn’t want. Serves me right.