In the weeks and months before the World Cup – England are absolute shite. Overpaid, pampered, don’t care about playing for their country, manager not good enough, couldn’t hack it in the Premier League. We won’t even get through the group stages.

In the days before the World Cup – Good build up, manager has imposed his style on the team, squad united, exciting young talent, full of passion, we might surprise a few people.

On the day of the first game – Really fancy us today, young hungry squad, should beat Tunisia with something to spare, excitement building, we should reach the Quarter Finals with this squad and manager.

After the first game – Very disappointing. Expected so much more, overpaid Premier League prima donnas, manager clueless tactically, how did (insert name) get selected ahead of (insert another name), no passion.

After the third game – Well, what a load of crap that was. Players didn’t want it, players not good enough, need an experienced manager, sack the manager who is tactically inept, (insert names) should never play for their country again. Who are Man United playing in the first Premier League game of the new season?