Warning: contains recycled material.
It’s almost the time of year when I have a good whinge about Children In Need. Not that the idea of raising money for sick and disadvantaged is in any way a bad thing. Of course it isn’t. But I’m afraid it is rapidly turning into an American-style shitfest, belonging almost exclusively to the rich, the famous and not so famous, but still rich. And the worst possible example? Chris Evans.
Chris Evans is, in my opinion, the best DJ of his generation and one of the best TV presenters. It is not a coincidence that his Radio Two breakfast show is the most listened to radio show in Europe. Through that show, Evans raises millions for Children In Need, but how? By tickling the tummies of millionaires.
Every year, Evans comes up with a stellar list of prizes for listeners to bid for. There are nine auctions this year, all of which are now closed. The lowest went for £53k, the highest, a 45 minute Take That show anywhere in the country, went for £1.1 million. Not raffles: auctions. Rich people bidding against other rich people for prizes that are well beyond the means of 99.9% of the public. A businesswoman called Elaine Fairfax gets to host the band because she is stinking rich.
“Oh well,” I hear you say. “It’s all good, the money goes to help children” and you are probably right and it probably needs to because tax dodger Gary Barlow managed to squirrel millions away through dodgy schemes at before announcing “This is a charity we all love.” Of course you do, Gary. Of course you do.
And then there is the old adage which goes as follows: charity exists only to pay for the things we as a society do not deem important enough to pay for through our taxes. That is why Children In Need exists in the first place: to improve the lives of children who would otherwise have a life of absolute hell.
It used to be that ordinary people dipped into their pockets to raise funds, but those days are changing and it’s the rich and even the corporates who are joining in. Look out for the latter getting free advertising throughout tomorrow’s show, holding up their enormous cardboard cheques.
But Chris Evans’s auctions for the rich are just part of the story. Be prepared for a line-up of millionaire stars to present little segments, asking for you to donate your tenner and I have no objection to that. I like the idea that rich entertainers and sports people give up their time to ask us to pay money to the charity, but if the very rich paid a few per cent more, vulnerable children would not be relying on the begging bowl of a BBC fundraising show to live a better live.
That’s how I see it, a Class A cynic, sick to the back teeth of seeing the sick, the needy and the vulnerable left at the bottom of the pile in society, virtually ignored, apart from once a year through a charity show.
Of course you should give what you can and in my opinion your fiver is worth as much as some rich businesswoman’s £1.1 million. I’ll bet you miss that fiver more than she misses her £1.1 million. But don’t expect Chris Evans and his millionaire pals to acknowledge such a small sum. He’ll be too busy gushing about the “generosity” of a few millionaires.
Despite all this, I like and admire Chris Evans, but he understands about as much about real people and how they live their lives as the Royal Family.
