Say what you like about Radio 2 favourite Noel Gallagher, he knows, or maybe knew, how to write a catchy tune. Even Oasis cynics like me recognise that. And soon, in the UK and, as boxing and darts announcers always add, “around the world”, Oasis will rise from the dead for one last time as part of their ‘Pension Plan’ tour.
Fifty-something men will soon be packing venues for rock’s biggest singalong show of 2025, a kind of sneering, snarling version of Black Lace, armed with lyrics that are no more meaningful than ‘Agadoo’.
No one, least of all the punters who are already saving up for lengthy pre gig Wetherspoon sessions is pretending that this ‘final’, ‘not to repeated’ tour is anything but a money-making nostalgia exercise. This will all be about Don’t Look Back In Anger and Wonderwall, a point confirmed by their co-manager Alec McKinlay: “This is very much the last time around, as Noel’s made clear in the press. It’s a chance for fans who haven’t seen the band to see them, or at least for some of them to … there’s no plan for any new music.” The last bit is key. Neither Gallagher, least of all the talented one Noel, are going to spend time writing new songs anytime soon.
My suspicion with Oasis and, frankly most oldie bands, is that fans do not want new songs. The last thing they’d want is for Liam to swagger on stage and announce “ere’s a new fookin’ song what our kid wrote”.
An old acquaintance told me when tickets went on sale that he knew full well why this tour was taking place, that he was aware everyone was going to be ripped off through dynamic pricing and the most expensive merch in the history of rock, but none of this mattered. Finally, he would be seeing Noel and Liam live and in person. “The soundtrack of my life,” he added, descending into pure gobbledegook, rather like most of Noel’s lyrics.
Few people believe that Oasis were anywhere near the all time greats of rock and roll. There was nothing original about their music or their shtick, yet it somehow captured the zeitgeist of the time. Noel is a bang average guitar player, Liam can barely sing at all and maybe, even definitely maybe, that’s the key to their success. They look and sound like the men who love them, men can relate to them. They drink, they swear, they love football. And, as we said before, it’s comfy singalong music for fans to consume and love as the waves of nostalgia wash over them. What is wrong with that?
“This is very much the last time around,” says McKinlay, and who knows, it may actually be unless “unprecedented public demand” persuades the brothers to do it one more time, say, at Knebworth. Five never to be repeated shows?
In the case of Oasis, nostalgia very definitely is what it used to be and for as long as the Gallaghers want to tour the hits, the fans will be out in their million hordes. And you know what? Everyone from the brothers on stage to the sea of pot bellies and bald patches in the crowd is happy. If they play Acquiesce, their one great song, even I might like it.
