A new Channel 4 programme has attracted a great deal of criticism from shocked viewers. It’s called “Naked Attraction”, a sort of Blind Date with pubes from all accounts. I speak from a position of ignorance as I haven’t even seen more than a brief glimpse of the offending show, but I have to say it does not appear to be my kind of programme.

So far as I can tell – and this could be wrong – a group of people standing behind screens, displaying only their nether regions and someone who cannot get a partner by more conventional means selects their date by, in a woman’s case, assessing how a man’s testicles are hanging. I was not previously aware that testicles were of paramount importance in starting off a relationship but perhaps I have led a sheltered life. Imagine referring to the spherical objects as part of a chat up line. “I’ve got two, you know. And they don’t half dangle!”

I saw a glimpse of one show where a naked woman was being interviewed by a (thankfully) dressed female presenter, in the company of two naked men. The men discussed her breasts and her pubic hair with incredible reverence and, indeed, affection but it was obvious that neither of them were – how shall I say this – attracted to her in a sexual way.

And I guess the whole point of a show like this is titillation. Why else would you produce such a show? There’s no great intellectual statement about it, just a bunch of wannabes awkwardly prancing across a TV studio floor, glancing occasionally at sweaty cameraman, directors and runners.

There was a time I would make a point of watching anything that featured female nudity. But that all ended when some years ago I watched a programme called “Naked Jungle” and whilst ogling the naked ladies was shocked and later traumatised by Keith ‘Cheggers’ Chegwin dashing about the set, his modestly sized organ flapping wildly in front of him. I have never felt quite the same about TV nudity since.

One thing I would not do regarding “Naked Attraction” other than watch it would be to complain about it because this comes straight from the Mary Whitehouse school of complaining about something that I could simply have switched off in the first place. I recommend you all do the same.