I was in desperate need of some good news. The world is on fire, the fascist right is on the march both at home and abroad and soon it will be Christmas, and you know what that means: Mrs Brown’s Boys. But mercy, mercy me. Maybe there is a God after all because this year’s Mrs Brown’s Boys Christmas specials have been cancelled.
I know of no one who admits to liking, or even watching, this wretched programme, the premise of which is a very obvious man dressing up as a woman called Agnes Brown. I have nothing against men dressing up as women but quite why the BBC could not employ an actual woman to play the part is a little lost on me.
The show has been running for donkey’s years, or at least it feels that way, and in the early days I did tune in just to see what it was like. I concluded very quickly that it was like shit. The jokes weren’t funny and yet the studio audience, who may well have been supplied with large quantities of alcohol and drugs, were in hysterics. Yet there I was, sighing deeply with a stone-faced expression.
Humour is in the ear of the beholder, I suppose. Many years ago, I was watching television with my late stepfather (I hasten to add that he was not ‘late’ at the time) and Victoria Wood was on. I have never seen anyone laugh so much. My stepdad was roaring with laughter, completely uncontrollable. I feared he might at one point expire. Yet I found her about as funny as a burning orphanage, as Bernard Manning once put it. Every gag that reduced the old boy to a quivering mess left me cold.
Luckily for him, he never lived to see Mrs Brown’s Boys. On the few occasions I have seen it, I felt incredibly envious of him.
Mrs Brown’s Boys was until this year the culmination of a dire Christmas Night’s viewing on BBC1. It’s always Strictly, Michael McIntyre, Call The Midwife and East Fucking Enders, just in case you have been enjoying yourself too much, followed by the ultimate shit show. Luckily in our family, no one wants to watch the sodding show. Who are these people who do?
I have never heard anyone say: “Did you see Mrs Brown’s Boys on Christmas night?”, let alone, ‘Wasn’t it great?” Someone, somewhere, sure did see it and thought it was great? It would be a bit like saying, “I had a delicious light lunch today, eating the contents of my nose” or “My favourite lager is Madri”. There are probably millions of people who do both of these things but are, rightly, far too embarrassed to admit it. But there is some bad news to all this. The show has not been cancelled forever.
O’Carroll has broken his jaw and needs surgery to repair it and it won’t be fixed in time to film the Christmas specials. I am not hard-hearted enough to not wish him a full and speedy recovery but unfortunately when he is better, the show will be back.
The BBC has said this: “We wish Brendan a full and speedy recovery and are working with him on plans for Mrs Brown’s Boys in 2027.” Shit. In every silver lining there’s a dark cloud and here’s mine for next year. Enjoy the good news while you can.
