How the world has changed! I was thinking about this just yesterday as I made my umpteenth visit to our local medical centre to attempt to secure access to the three apps I need in order to have access to health services. There’s the NHS app, anima, whatever the fuck that is, and, given the circumstances, the ironically named Patient Access. I was locked out of all of them and following yesterday’s trip, I still am.
I was given what appeared to be simple instructions to make all these apps work and it ended in inglorious failure. I am still locked-out of all of them and have to order repeat prescriptions, arrange blood tests, seek advice and make appointments the old fashioned way, by turning up in person.
I am not against doing stuff online. Visiting the GP is not among my favourite activities at the best of time – let’s be honest: who really says, “I love visiting the doctor?” – and doing stuff from the comfort of my armchair beats having to queue with a group of coughing, sneezing and spluttering old codgers (a bit like me, then). But none of the fixes have fixed my issues. I fear another pointless, time-consuming visit awaits.
The reception staff in our health centre are all kind and friendly, quite a contrast from the old health centre days where the receptionist was more of a gatekeeper, whose prime function was to prevent one wasting a doctor’s valuable time by asking to see her or him. Now the GP appointments appear to be non-existent, the norm appears to be speaking with people who are not medical professionals, like prescribing pharmacists who can’t prescribe anything (“You’ll need to speak to your GP about that!”).
Yesterday’s receptionist tinkered around on the keyboard and accessed the health centre’s pages. “You need to make an appointment to have your blood pressure taken,” she smiled. I explained that I’d had a text, which I’d inadvertently deleted, to say it was for something else. “Oh, let’s check.” A few moments passed. “Cholesterol?” I shook my head. After a few false starts, we finally got there and I made an appointment for a blood test to be taken sometime in early 2026. (I’m kidding. It in just over two weeks.)
That sorted, I went home and spent far too long trying and failing to make my apps work. All this hassle just makes my mental health worse.
I don’t care much for looking back all the time but in this instance I feel I must. When I were a lad, our doctor’s surgery was on Wick Road in Briz (that’s Brislington for the benefit of non-Bristolians). There were two GPs based there and if you needed to see one of them, you turned up for the morning surgery or the afternoon one. There was no vast medical team of specialist nurses, assistants, nor was there an army of admin staff. You walked into the waiting room, sat there, remembering where you were in the queue and when it was your turn, you walked in and the doctor would retrieve your notes from a filing cabinet. If you needed something minor sorting, like removing a verruca or a small growth from one’s scrotum, the doctor did it there and then. I’m not saying this is the right way to do things, but my God it made things much quicker. The move from small surgeries to all singing, all dancing medical centres has probably provided better outcomes for patients, but it can be such a nause. Especially when the IT doesn’t work, or the patient, as in me, can’t make it work.
Don’t get me wrong. I absolutely love the computer age. It so beats having to do my creative writing on a typewriter. Can you imagine how time-consuming and wasteful that was? I could probably get through a large tree every few days with the amount of paper I had to throw away. I love the idea I don’t have to use cash anymore, that banking is all on my phone, I can do my weekly shopping without the hassle of going to the supermarket. It’s great when it works, which is normally does. But this health malarkey? Not so much.
Modern problems again, eh? Straightforward solutions making things harder, at least when it comes to the wacky world of public health. If I have to do business with my local health centre, it would be nice if the IT worked, or at least that I could work it. I am not sure which it is, but it’s really pissing me off. I hope I don’t die before I can access the apps again. That would be a nuisance.
