And now we go live to The One Show on BBC One, presented by Roman Kemp. Later, you can see Race Around The World, with Roman Kemp. Tomorrow, it’s over to Sky for Premier League Friday, with Roman Kemp and soon you will be able to see a new show on BBC One called Just One Thing, presented by Clive Myrie, Zoe Ball and … who’s the other guy? Oh yes – Roman Kemp. I think we get the idea by now. A new law must have been brought in when we weren’t watching which means that Roman Kemp must be featured either as a presenter or a contestant. Either way, it’s impossible to escape him.
It is a complete coincidence that Roman has a fabulously rich and famous father, Spandau Ballet bass player Martin Kemp, who seems to appear in the shows that his son doesn’t and of course that he enjoyed the best private education money can buy. Neither of these things had any positive influence on his career. Clearly, his path to fame was based entirely upon his career as that most 21st century of all occupations, the presenter.
Presenters these days are often the stars. The two cheeky Geordie chaps Ant and Dec seem to carry out the job of one presenter and there are the likes of the modestly talented AJ Adudu, Philip Schofield, Emma Willis, Ben Shephard, Davina McCall, Alex Jones, Vernon Kay, Cat Deeley, Rylan Clark, Holly Willoughby and a long, long list of others whose talent, such as it is, extends to reading confidently from an autocue.
Once upon a time, the presenter was literally there to introduce the real talent, those who can actually create, but now the presenter is the star and these days when many young children are asked what they want to do when they grow up, they want to be a presenter. And why wouldn’t they? No need to do the tricky stuff, like writing a song, acting in a blockbuster movie or participating in an act of sporting greatness when you can achieve fame by announcing on television, “And welcome to the Big Brother house.”
I have nothing personal against any of these presenters. Indeed, in some cases I have seen very little of their work and in the case of Ant and Dec almost none at all. It’s just that, in some cases, you really can have enough of someone.
Clearly, my cynicism towards TV presenters is not shared by the massed millions who watch TV. Indeed, when it comes to the National TV Awards, a show I have never seen, there is a best presenter category which, until this year, was always won by the hosts of the show, Ant and Fucking Dec.
In truth, nothing has changed. Presenters, regardless of their lack of creative talent, are the stars these days, sometimes more so than the talent they actually present and perhaps that’s a reflection of our changing world, defined by former Tory MP Michael Gove who memorably announced one day that “people have had enough of experts“. Reality TV shows, which to me bear no relationship to the reality I understand, require presenters and given that contestants are usually ordinary folk the likes of AJ Adudu can eke out a decent living presenting the shows in which they participate.
I’ve nothing against Roman Kemp, who I know has had his issues with poor mental health. I just happen to think he’s part of the modern TV revolution whereby nearly anyone who’s good looking enough can be a star if only they can keep calm, smile and read out the words someone has written for them. “But what can you actually do?” is not a question asked of TV stars to be these days, unless the answer is “Present“. In which case, “We’ve got a new reality show coming out, how do you feel about being the star presenter? You don’t have to be talented at anything.”
