Plastic Patriot

by Rick Johansen

Senne Lammens, Diogo Dalot, Noussair Mazraoui, Matthijs De Ligt, Lisandro Martinez, Tyrell Malacia, Patrick Dorgu, Leny Yoro, Bruno Fernandes, Casemiro, Manuel Ugarte, Matheus Cunha, Joshua Zirkzee, Amad, Bryan Mbeumo, Benjamin Sesko and many more, have I got news for you: Manchester United’s part-owner Sir Jim Brexit Ratcliffe says: “The UK has been colonised by immigrants, really, hasn’t it,” strangely failing to add, “including most of our first team.” Given that far right gobshite Nigel Farage chimed in last night to support Sir Jim’s blatantly racist comments, if I was one of Man Ure’s overseas superstars, I’d be worried about being deported. Coming over here, taking your club into a Champions League position (unfortunately) and generally making shit loads of money for your fellow owners who are also not British. Well done, Sir Jim.

It is very odd that the billionaire owner of Ineos hates migrants so much because he is one. He moved many years ago to Monaco in order to avoid paying British taxes. Such a patriot, not contributing to the well-being of the country he rages about having been colonised by Johnny Foreigner. The hypocrisy of these people knows no bounds.

At this point, it is important to acknowledge that people do have concerns about immigration, particularly on the effects to our culture. I kind of get it. That’s why I am a secularist. I am not bothered about people worshipping the Gods of their choice and retaining their own customs as long as all of it is within the law of the land and that no special privileges are accorded to anyone.

A couple of years ago, one of Man Ure’s players, the Moroccan  Mazraoui, refused to wear a jacket supporting the LGTBQ campaign because of his religious beliefs, those being that he is a Muslim homophobe. Instead of standing up to his bigotry, his team mates showed solidarity with his religious-based homophobia by also refusing to wear the jackets. Woah, hang on, then: what did Sir Jim do about it? Absolutely Jack Shit, fuck all. Maybe he hates gays as much as he hates Johnny Foreigner? Maybe there is a long list of others he hates, too? Poor people, perhaps, or fellow pensioners like himself?

Ratcliffe simply appears to be a wrong ‘un. One of the first things he did when buying a small share of Man Ure was to sack the lowest paid staff on the books, while spending large fortunes on – well, I might as well say it – players who might, as he would put it, colonise Old Trafford.

For reasons that can wait until another day, I have reservations about multiculturalism, depending on how the term is interpreted. But I have no issues whatsoever with migrants per se. How could I have given that I have less than 20% of English DNA myself? But then, I live within the law of the land, I do not practice a religion that runs counter to our history and culture, but then my advocacy of secularism means that no one should.

Sir Jim is merely employing the dog whistle politics of fascists like the Fagash Fuhrer Farage when it comes to immigration. And just wait until you see what he has to say about people on benefits.

If I was one of Man Ure’s immigrants, I might consider downing tools until Ratcliffe apologises, which I expect to happen on the 12th of Never. Much of United’s success over the years, though happily not recently, has been founded upon the work of migrant players and managers. Out of the country and out of touch, Ratcliffe, like so many of these petulant billionaires have nothing to offer, bar their obscene wealth which in his case is stashed abroad and not in the country he loves so much.

We have enough plastic patriots as it is. Ratcliffe is but another one. If we really are going to kick the migrants out, let’s start with him.

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