Probably my favourite story in recent weeks surrounds Donald Trump. Not so much to do with his odious far right politics but because of Theresa May’s fear that Trump will throw a wobbly if he is not invited to the wedding of Prince Harry and Meghan Markle. Worse for the Donald is who could be invited, one of whom could be Harry’s new best friend Barack Obama.

I listened to Harry’s less than stellar performance as guess editor of the Today programme. Quite apart from the thought that the BBC could surely seek to attract new broadcasting talent from people who are actually seeking to build a career in journalism rather than a prince with, perhaps, too much time on his hands, it was moderately amusing to hear Harry and Barack engage in some gentle, not-quite-embarrasing joshing. It was also very obvious they get on very well. That wedding invite must be a given.

Trump, meanwhile, will be gutted and will doubtless tweet as much. There is not a snowball’s chance in hell that he will be invited to Harry and Meghan’s nuptials. If Obama is in town, he will be surrounded by the security services. If Trump came to town, he’d need the entire army to protect him.

Doubtless a lack of invite will ensure the ending, at least for now, of the “special relationship” between Britain and the USA which doesn’t really exist. Gone will be those amazing trade deals once we leave the EU. At least we will be spared chlorinated chicken and hormone-fed beef. Indeed, Trump will probably invoke sanctions against the UK.

Theresa May will be desolate. She will probably fly straight to Washington to hold Trump’s hand, to allow the distress to set in. I’m not bothered about the royal wedding but I am looking forward to seeing Trump’s reaction when he is not invited and Obama is.