The government is making an announcement this week on improving mental health care. Theresa May is committed to improving mental health services and why? Because she says so. But as so much with this wretched, inept, out-of-her-depth prime minister, it does not take long to see through the fog of spin and lies. There is nothing new.

I’d go further than that. There’s nothing new because there’s actually nothing at all, other than this gem: ‘Better mental health care: including round the clock advice on NHS111 by 2023’. Now excuse me but thanks to my long experience in this area, I know a thing or two about mental health care and I put it to you that round the clock advice is already on offer: it’s called the Samaritans.

I could be cynical, I suppose, and suggest that because of this government’s obsession with private good, public bad, May’s government is entering into competition with the Samaritans. Putting suicide out to tender. Is this what we have been reduced to?

The NHS111 line, for all its merits, cannot possibly bring about better mental health care. One on one therapy cannot be carried out by a quick phone call, medication to treat various types of mental illness would not normally be prescribed on the basis of a quick chat down the line. Far from doing something about the epidemic of mental ill health, Theresa May wants to make it look like she is doing something about the epidemic of mental ill health. I might be mad and stupid but I’m not that mad and stupid.

Don’t patronise us, Mrs May, with your empty rhetoric about “a country that works for everyone”. You don’t mean it with mental health than you do about everything else. You are another here today, gone tomorrow politician. And you have been an integral part of government that has slashed mental health provision, so how can we believe you when you say you want to improve it?