My golf handicap

It is only right that if I am to brag about my very good scores on the golf course, that I also fess up, as the kids say, when things are not so good.

Barely a week after a series of excellent scores on the Thornbury Par 3 course, culminating in a three over par 57, I returned to the tees and blasted an horrendous 76. The conditions were absolutely perfect, the course was largely deserted but my game gradually fell apart. The next day, yesterday, I decided to put things right but if my game fell apart on Monday, this time it went into complete meltdown. If you think a front nine of 50 is bad – and it really is – then think of a back nine of 79. Yes, a round on a Par 3 course of 129, only three shots better, or should that be less worse, than my worst rounds on a proper course (132 at the Kendleshire and Bowood).

It is hard to believe I played as badly as I did. I have completely lost the ability to hit the ball in the air, and straight and any distance at all. I have a severe case of the shanks. All this culminated in the worst hole of golf I have ever played, the 15th. The 15th is the scene of one of my two holes in one in my three year golf career and I average just over four on the hole. Now I count, honestly, every single shot and with my third shank, I ended up in the bunker. With my game in bits, this was not good news and I took – wait for this – 21 shots to get out, after which I three-putted.

Golf is a funny old game and once something, maybe a tiny little thing, goes wrong, your swing can be ruined and what makes things even more frustrating is that you cannot see what it is. I know I am suddenly doing something horribly wrong, but I just cannot see what it is. It was with a heavy heart that tonight I drove back to Thornbury to try and sort out my swing on the driving range. I have been told by many golfers that you cannot sort your game out on the course, you need to hit balls. So I hit balls.

I bought a hundred range balls and started with my driver. And suddenly, I was hitting the ball reasonably well. The odd hook, the odd slice, most shots going slightly left, my game was back again. I then got out my 7 iron and once again I was hitting the ball okay. I was hitting too many balls slightly to the right, but I was able to adjust. Then I switched to a rescue club and my 5 iron and I was back to yesterday. Shanking, hitting the ball no distance at all along the ground. No matter what I did, it was a mess. I took lots of practice shots, but it was if I had never before played the game. I think Gary Player once said “The more I practiced, the luckier I got” but the more I practiced, the worse I got!

I have been here before. I am going to take a break from golf now, maybe as long as five days. Golf is 50% mental and 50% mental. As I am 100% mental, do I really have a chance?