The annual Which? guide to British airports was published today, revealing that Doncaster/Sheffield airport is the best in the land and Luton the worst. The results are compiled by asking passengers what they think of their airport experience. I wonder who is really interested?

Whenever possible, I fly from Bristol airport which comes slap bang in the middle of people’s experiences. Average delays in everything and better than average (presumably smaller?) queues at passport control (how bad must the rest be?). Flying to foreign climes this very week, I honestly could not care less.

My flight routine will be the same as ever. It will involve closing down parts of my brain until I get through security, grabbing the obligatory overpriced 5.00 am pint of something alcoholic and eating pre-purchased Sainsbury’s Breakfast Triple sandwiches and that’s pretty well it.

I know there are alternative solutions for those who really love being in airports, like the ‘Aspire’ lounge where people can imagine they are special and important for a few hours in a Pound Shop ‘VIP’ area (without Pound Shop prices) and even get their money’s worth if they shovel down as many bacon sarnies and G&Ts as possible. The airport, to me, is merely functional, a bridge between being at home and being on holiday. I’d no more want to spend additional time at the airport than at a bus stop. Still, each to their own.