One thing that has not happened since Bedminster born Bristol City supporter Colin Sexstone joined the Bristol Rovers board of directors is the dire level of communication emanating from the boardroom. Sexstone, or Sextone as he is known by the BBC, seems to have assumed the non existent role of Communications Director, and informs us that he is confident that the UWE stadium will go ahead. But just as you think he is going to tell us all something new, he retreats into the world of what experts refer to as “Higgery” where a spokesman, usually the chairman, adds, “There is a lot of work going on behind the scenes, which for obvious reasons cannot be disclosed.” Behind the scenes, eh? That old chestnut.
“There are lots of things bubbling under, a takeover could potentially be one,” said Sexstone, not adding, “But you don’t think I am going to tell you lot, do you?” Just when you’re getting excited, he reveals that, “there is no one particular group” waiting to throw money at the Gas, but that nice Mr Bradshaw knows a bloke in Dubai. He’s hoping to contact the bloke once he learns how to use emails.
So what have we learned from Mr Sexstone?
– There is work going on “behind the scenes”
– There are “lots of things bubbling under”
– “Discussions are ongoing with Sainsbury’s” (I thought I saw Mr Higgs at the salad bar last week!)
– That’s it.
And then we return to the world of waffle as practised in the wonderful, wacky world of Bristol Rovers.
According to the BBC, the former Bristol City chairman also believes moving to a new ground on the outskirts of the city will hugely boost the club. Well, no shit Sherlock. I’ll bet that never even occurred to Nick Higgs or anyone else at the club, never mind the supporters, so thanks for that Col. And, with nothing else to say, Sexstone comes out with the usual, “new stadiums take clubs to another level and the location of that new stadium is just fantastic, next to a motorway, two stations right there, lots of parking and 30,000 students on your doorstep. Can you pad it out a bit, Keith, to make it look like there’s something of significance here? Thanks – CS.” I am not sure if the last bit was meant to be there, but it could be that I write it myself.
The interview with Mr Sexstone is what is known as a holding statement. That is to say that nothing much of any consequence is going on, there’s nothing to tell you, but we’ll tell you anyway. Anyway, he’s confident, just like he was about City’s new ground until that bloody village green nonsense came along and his beloved reds decided to redevelop Ashton Gate instead. Deja Vu, anyone?